what i imagine florida to be like

bisexualbrucewayne:

some guy to his neighbor: tom, you need to help me! there’s an alligator in my home going by my name watching my tv with my wife and kids
tom: i know, jim. we like him better now and we call him new jim. he’s replaced you and you will be sacrificed to appease the orange gods, as is the florida way

(via kalianos)