ask-oncies-jizz:

pipistrellus:

Hey you know that really disturbing thing where you yawn and your salivary gland shoots a concentrated spray of saliva out of one of its horrid nozzles like you’re a venom spitting snake for some godawful reason

this is the most distressing post ive ever read because not only have i never once seen or even heard of this but there are dozens of people in the notes reaffirming it with shit like “yeah i do that all the time” “i had a friend who could do this on command” what the real, genuine fucking fuck

(via timurmurtazin)

sketchy-red-dude:

paper-mario-wiki:

acoolguy:

nogirlfriend:

I’ve made an oath to never watch Adam Sandler and you should too!

someone has to watch him at all times or he will escape

SCP

Sandler Containment Procedures

(via meat-monster-deactivated2018010)

paper-mario-wiki:

The Girl Reading This (the concept, not the literal person who is reading this post) is an SCP who is capable of being everywhere at all times while posessing every possible trait and fitting every conceivable description placed upon her

(via not-the-conversation-starter)

shitpost-senpai:

Japanese mascots come in three flavors

Adorable:

Comical:

And Condensed Nightmares:

(via micchy-did-nothing-wrong)