youcantfuckapokemon:

You can’t fuck a Gardevoir. I don’t care if it has sexy long leg and the downright marvelous sparkly anime eyes, it’s a fucking Pokemon. It’s part of the Amorphous egg group. Ya wanna know what that means buddy pal? 

 That means that fucking it would be like putting ya dick in something formless and malleable and squishy and I don’t even wanna think about how that feels. That’s probably someone’s fetish but that’s fucked up. Also the only holes it probably has are it’s mouth and the black holes it can make. 

Yanno I study mega-evolution and it’s downright amazing to watch my good friend mega evolve her Gardevoir but now every time I see her do it I remember the shitty fucking porn I see when I just want to look at these gorgeous creatures and it makes me die inside. 

 I don’t care about some “will serve and protect it’s trainer and care for them” pokedex bullcrap, it can serve you and love you in ways that don’t involve trying ta fuck it. Hug and cuddle your Gardevoir, don’t try ta fuck it ya sick freak. JFC. Fuck a human. I do it all the time. Go by a bar (or cafe if I feel classy), pick up someone, and then I fuck ‘em, it’s really not that hard.

(via magearna)