derpes

And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”

And Abraham replied, “What.”

stultifyandstupefy

God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.

the-adequate-gatsby

And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”

To which they responded, “Gay.” 

recreationalcannibalism

And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.

nerdofchaos

see you all in hell