WARNING: After listening to this you will not be able to enjoy the official version any more. Thrust me man it was a bad idea clicking this 5 months ago “orz

1 note4 years ago

delicate-ribbon-bunny:

High-waisted Lace Strap Skirt

(Source: delicateribbonbunny.storenvy.com, via siebewastaken)

304 notes4 years ago

chefpyrosjunk-deactivated201707: HOW BIG IS YOUR DICK?


conspicuouslad:

lizzymodblog:

penguinpotential:

image

image

image

image

This is still the best response anyone could have given to this question.

toilet water is cold

a treu Sagan always sprinkels when he dinkels conrad.

317 notes4 years ago
THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE by MusicalCombusken

THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE by MusicalCombusken

6 notes4 years ago

Let’s turn today into a day of cooking why the hell not

3 notes4 years ago

chefpyrosjunk-deactivated201707: I can only blog my personal recipes for so long; I only have so many. I can draw for an ask blog practically indefinitely. Also, relating work to hobbies is never a good idea.


lizzymodblog:

bonmod:

conspicuouslad:

Fair.

Still kinda want to see you do one.

I would buy a recipie book laden with dittoprize’s swearing. It’d get me pumped everytime I put on the apron!

Also, check out “What the Fuck Should I Have for Dinner”. I think they got published!

Coming soon to a book store near you:

Cooking for Fucking Morons

(Near you if you’re European, that is. Otherwise, too bad, ya twat. Guess you’re not learning how to cook. Guess you’re starving to death. Ohhh no.)

Featuring amazing recipes such as

  • a cake filled with a fuckload of bananas
  • a banana filled with a fuckload of cake
  • the kind of vegetable that counts as a fire hazard
  • the salad that causes diabetes
  • the candy that cures diabetes
  • the soufflé that rises straight through your ceiling, thus causing a shitton of property damage but nevertheless you still feel it was worth it because holy shit that thing was delicious
  • edible shit, to serve to people who you think should eat shit. (may contain traces of shit)
  • chicken that tastes like strawberries
  • dynamite flambé
  • some actual recipes that ditto uses in her day-job as a chef in a restaurant
  • a lifetime prison sentence for poisoning your boss, who came over to have a friendly dinner and talk about your future
  • the gordon-ramsay-wet-dream apple fritter
  • a correctly peeled banana
  • haggis that tastes like ass
  • but all haggis tastes like ass
  • aye, but in the right hands it can taste like some mighty fine ass
  • humpty dumpty’s violently assaulted corpse
  • a scarf made using chopsticks
  • boy-attracting milkshakes
  • dogs so hot they are literally on fire
  • the edible swan ice sculpture (may contain actual swan)

ORDER NOW OR GET PUNCHED IN THE DICK

BUT WAIT!!

If you call in the next 5 minutes we will include a special edition cardboard Scootoaster!! That’s right, your very own orange shitty toaster made entirely out of cardboard!!

46 notes4 years ago

lizzymodblog:

mistystriker:

Every Hat in TF2 by AshleyLange [x]

Otherwise entitled “How to annoy everybody’s Tumblr dash”

Do you love the colour of the hat?

(Source: ashleylange.deviantart.com, via )

18,077 notes4 years ago

not-reality:

gearholder can I borrow Gear♀?

Thx

whatre you planing, demonpanda? è_é

(via nephritedblog)

12 notes4 years ago
sneakymonster:
“
”

sneakymonster:

image

(via slapmango)

112,418 notes4 years ago

cutiverse-deactivated20161031: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥


And now, for my next analogy you shall be playing the role of Homer while I’ll be playing the role of the Estonian Dwarf, and your hearts will be playing the role of that rock on the ground there. Ready, go! ; w;

3 notes4 years ago