Live and Love under Patooties' peculiar light
- me:*posts a thing*
- me:this could either make or break my career
- friend:you'd lose the restaurant?
- me:this could either make or break my hobby
i heard there was a john cena meme
We’ll all pay for the crimes we’ve committed someday
welp that’s a wrap, full circle and the internet is over, everybody go back to your lives
Nobody has been able to successfully fool me with this meme in forever but I didn’t even expect it there Congratulations
(via funfetti-cakke)
Input: Nice glasses.
Setting: Very Fine.
Output: A pair of contact lenses with the same properties SCP-558-3 possesses, although these are not green in coloration, instead being clear to the naked eye, but testing indicates they have a color that can only be perceived by the wearer.
Anonymous: I'd like to give one bowl of salad
Input: One (1) bowl of salad.
Setting: 1:1
Output: One (1) bowl of vegetable soup.
Anonymous: When is it going to dawn on you that Lizzy is just a terrible, terrible person?
When is it going to dawn on you that I am? .-.
GODDAMIT ELIZABETH FINE
Input: One (1) SHOEBOX FILLED WITH 8 KITTENS, LABELED “KITTEN ORPHANAGE”.
Setting: ROUGH
Output: A PILE OF SHREDDED CARDBOARD AND PAPER, AND 8 SMALL PILES OF MINCED MEAT, BONE SPLINTERS, AND UNEVENLY CUT ORGANS DRIPPING BLOOD. THE FLESH APPEARS BURNT IN SOME AREAS AND ONE EYE (THE ONLY THING STILL MOSTLY COMPLETE) SEEMS TO STILL BE RESPONSIVE TO LIGHT.
BITCH! THE MACHINE INPUT BOOTH IS ONLY 3 x 2.1 x 2.1m (10 x 7 x 7ft) IT CAN’T FIT A ORPHANAGE!! >:U