sorry I can’t hang out today, I’m partaking in a vivid mass hallucination of a 1973 mafia thriller by martin scorsese. Yeah it’s gonna be all day
Goncharov Lore Thus Far, based on the top tumblr post results
- Main cast are Goncharov himself, his wife Katya (née Michailov), and Andrey
- One side character is named Mario Ambrosini. He is described as a “sad boi” and is involved in gambling.
- Set in Naples and involving a drug ring/mafia. The plot seems to involve Russian organized crime attempting to get a foothold in Italy.
- There is a Boat Scene. Katya survives via resourcefulness.
- Andrey and Goncharov have a substantial amount of homoeroticism. Andrey also has an internet in Katya. This forms a true love triangle.
- At some point, Katya threatens to shoot Goncharov. This is framed as a Girlboss Moment.
- There is also a Beer Bottle Scene.
- Katya fakes her death.
- heavy clock symbolism. A pivotal scene occurs at a clock tower, there is a grandfather clock in the background of some sets, etc
- A supporting female character named Sofia makes an appearance, wearing a cocktail dress. Katya protects her at some point. They’re both in the Boat Scene. At one point they buy fruit together in a marketplace. This is lesbian shipping fuel.
- The villain, likely Mario, has a sidekick named Icepick Joe. Joe commits a final act of heroism before being left for dead— after being killed by an Icepick. Perhaps he turned against Mario and was killed in retaliation?
- Goncharov, played by DeNiro, has a very distinctive manner of walking.
- Katya’s brother, Valery, makes an appearance.
from posts I’ve witnessed (only mentioning things I’ve seen >5 blogs post about)
- there is an Anchovies scene, and fish symbolism also plays a heavy role. at some point Katya is seen near a fish bowl full of goldfish, and this is important to the Boat Scene as well.
- Goncharov and Andrey have homoerotic tension, and this is used to further statements about the cycle of repression and violence
- The story involves Goncharov losing himself in a downward spiral. It is a tragedy of unbecoming.
- There’s a Bridge Scene. This is the one with the clocktower chiming in the background.
- There’s a scene involving a tank of anchovies.
- Icepick Joe has a traumatic backstory
- Katya betrays Goncharov AND Sofia. She’s well-intentioned, but it all comes crashing down, ending in her losing them both— losing Sofia emotionally and inadvertently causing Goncharov’s death
- There’s a shootout in Pompeii in which Mario destroys historically significant architecture. This is representative of the destructive nature of nationalism.
surprised to see a movie like Goncharov getting so popular on the website that found the moral nuance of steven universe to be unmanageable
why did you people come up with russian names for what is supposed to be a movie set in italy. what was the thought process here. why does she sound like she walked out of a tolstoy novel
an insane response, but i can’t fight this. carry on
Are you familiar with the works of Martin Scorsese?
after i saw goncharov i walked out of the theatre normally and without incident
fine. i did the goncharov walk. i hate this fucking website anyway
I have to hand it to Musk, nobody else could have fucked up quite on this scale, Twitter is a disaster right now
there will be lawsuits over this stuff
I’m too slow - Eli Lilly is apparently thinking about suing over this one:
(via kalianos)
I’m generally okay with the tumblr checkmarks for eight dollars because, like. websites need money to continue being websites. I like it here! I don’t want tumblr to cease to exist! Tumblr selling stupid little trinkets is preferable to tumblr becoming the bloated carcass that is every other website in order to stay afloat.
there’s a slider between user-funded and ad-funded and the further you are toward ad-funded the worse the website experience gets
(via kalianos)










